BREATH
a poem dedicated to my mother Joyce Stein Davidoff on the anniversary of her passing

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Mom
Joyce Stein Davidoff

Breath, it comes and goes.
And so we live and breathe
Until death do us part
And then it is gone.

Silently she suffered ongoing deformity
And ongoing joint pain for almost 40 years
Hands curled and fixed around the steering wheel of the Rover
She drove us everywhere and for everything,
From the dance halls to the rugby,  soccer, and cricket fields
to math lessons and music halls.
Coming and going,
Coming and going.

And most important
She taught us to dig deep, to express our true selves
And to do the right thing..

Her boys were always on her mind.
What a Mother she was!

And then it descended
Coming and going was not easy.
Neither was her breath
And then uneasy breathing came again
And did not go away.

She made it from Johannesburg to London
To the comfort of the home and family of big brother Baruch and loving Rahel
To the warmth and support of a welcoming Chabad community

Rosh Hashana was imminent
And she waited.
Her two other sons were coming from America
And she waited.

I slept in her bed the night before
Both of us curled and connected in fetal position.
I tried to hold the oxygen tube close to her nose
Trying to ease the coming and going of breath.
And she kept on pushing me away:
?Why is it so hard to die?? she asked
There was no sleep that night.

The next morning she took her last breath
And her boys rushed to her side.

Breath, it comes and goes.
And so we live and breathe
Until death do us part
And then it is gone.

In rushed the rabbi at that poignant moment.
?Did you say the shema? Did you recite the shema?? he implored.

We held each other, and with broken voices and tears running down our faces:
?Shema Yisrael Hashem Elokeinu Hashem Echad?
A prayer to Oneness

And then…….

One miraculous last huge and defiant breath
Suddenly came, … and then went.
What a Mother she was!
Her spirit lives on.