The Common Vein

Copyright 2009

 

I am Anael. In Hebrew my name is a prayer. ?Please God?.

Please God may we learn to respect, love and embrace all inhabitants of our planetary home. Please God may we lay down the limitations of our mind and open up to the infinite possibility of our hearts. Please God may we shift our focus from the strife between Cane and Abel and tend to the healing of our inner wounds. May we move from blame to responsibility. From hatred to love. From Pieces to Peace.

Please God?..

May we be willing to forgive the past and create a new tomorrow, May we be willing to invoke the wisdom of Sophia, Divine Mother, to heal and balance that which the divine masculine cannot do alone.

 May we lay down our weapons, our defenses,  and learn to tread the path of the spiritual warrior.

I was born in the month of August. In Africa. A Leo. I was far from connected then to how intertwined my life would become with the planetary alignment at the time of my birth.

Little did I know that my life story would propel me to embrace, own and even celebrate the qualities of my sun sign.  My life would become a cauldron , an alchemical initiation of sorts, transmuting my weaknesses into strength, my helplessness into power, and my fearful deer (my mother?s nickname for me was Bambi) into a lioness ready to forge an empowered path for her cubs to follow.

No longer would I stand by and watch my planetary home destroyed and my children led astray. No longer would I allow the wounds of the past to determine the blessings of my tomorrow.

Oh Lioness?May your medicine and much needed healing forge the path for generations  to come.

I am Anael. This is my story of moving from pieces to peace.

It began with the death of Amy, my fourth child. I gave birth to Amy at 11am on a Saturday, 17^th of May 1986.   We shared three precious hours on this planet  before she transitioned, leaving my belly empty and my breasts aching to nurture my beloved Amy who no longer was. The unbearable emptiness that followed filled me with suffering so great that I contemplated putting an end to my own life.

Amy?s death, opened the door for demons of the past to show themselves. Supressed childhood incest flushed my cells. I could no longer hide behind the façade of normality I had plastered on my face. Pulling on one thread unraveled an entire fabric that had held me asleep in the crib of my childhood. The illusion of my life started to hit me in the face and punch me in the belly? outwardly all looked so perfect and normal. I had to start asking questions, to search for the source of this deep wrenching pain. Seven years to the day of Amy?s birth and death, the memories of the incest started to surface and the lioness in me awoke from her long slumber.

 This took me on a spiritual journey to heal ?home? on many levels. I had to start dealing with the terror and lack of security I experienced as a child in my own home. It took me on a journey of having to look at the terror of being Jewish and never feeling safe outside of Israel and after moving ?home? at long last ? to ?safety?-  having to face  the terror of not feeling safe in my own land and then only to discover it is not even ?only? my own land, but belongs also to those I was taught were my enemy. Much later I was taken on a journey of losing my marriage and my ?home?.  My feelings of terror and of losing my safe space and foundation was once again an issue I had to deal with.

The lioness in me has done well ? it has been a long and arduous journey and I am sure there is more to come. I have healed and forgiven ? thus giving myself a life I deserve. I have found my mission with the many cubs I have the honor of empowering to become the lionesses of the future.

Israeli and Palestinian teenage girls ? Creativity for Peace has given me the channel to create from a place of love.  May their roar be heard, load and clear as they embrace the new path to peace where arms are used for hugging.

 

I am Anael.

My name is my prayer.

My poetry is my medicine.

May peace prevail on earth.

This is my song to you.