Copyright 2009
November of 2003 I took part in a workshop in Plum Village in France ? here is what I wrote about it and the poem For give ? was birthed there.
? I have just returned from Plum Village in France where a group of Israeli Jews and Arabs met with a group of Palestinians. Plum Village is headed by Thich Nhat Hanh, a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, scholar, poet and peace activist. At his community, and around the world, he writes, leads retreats and teaches the art of mindful living, and non-violence. He was nominated for the Nobel Peace prize by Martin Luther King Junior.
We were invited to come and learn from his wisdom, and the wisdom of the other nuns and monks, how they overcame their suffering in a non-violent way ? hopefully being able to come home with new tools to help and encourage a peaceful, non-violent way of ending the suffering in ourselves and therefore perhaps we will be able to have a ripple effect on others.
The only reason I can keep my hope these days is knowing that Nelson Mandela became president of South Africa. I was born there and my mind cannot grasp that this could be a reality?so as the suffering goes on, day after day, what keeps me hoping is for a miraculous solution and for us also to find our Nelson Mandela who will show us how to make peace without encouraging violence?.someone who will remind us of our light and not take us deeper into our darkness. I am aware that things are not perfect in South Africa, but had Mandela encouraged violence, I would hate to think of the bloodbath that would have occurred there.
I am hoping to go there at the end of this month, to a peace dance called For The One Dance ? which symbolises the end of separation?..for me this will be the closing of a circle. I have not been back for 20 years, and have not experienced South Africa without apartheid. This will allow me to touch my African roots again, where I will be able to ask for forgiveness for the hurt and suffering that I as a white person have caused and this will let me connect to Africa in way that I have never allowed myself before. I wish I could find the woman who held me on her back, who fed me, who sang to me, who saved me from abandonment while being forced to abandon her own. I feel that I am a warm and loving person because of the love and warmth I received from her. I need to thank her?.
Last night I decided to go to the movie house in my small village in order to have a break from all my emotions?. I didn?t even check what was showing?.and lo and behold?the movie was about a Jewish family who fled Germany and went to Africa?it could have been the story of my family?.?
This experience in Plum Village, opened me up to understand how someone can become terrorist. I completely condone this but it brought me to understand how this can happen. ?..a few months later I was in Haifa,.. the sirens roaring. I knew exactly what had happened. For the first time my immediate thought was ? what has happened to this person who blew himself up. What caused him to chose that path?. When I got home, I was confronted with the awful reality of the death of a friend of my daughter who was in that bus. He had gone to Haifa on his day off from the military to visit his grandmother?
Creativity for Peace has become part of my life. For The One Dance, my spiritual practice that helps me keep in balance with all the work I do with these courageous young woman. Today Silvia and I facilitate the dialogues at camp and here in Israel. We do not need the Americans to save us anymore ? we can help ourselves. We do need their support! Rachel was a wonderful teacher and now the girls can see that the Jew and an Arab can be the peacemakers.
I share my story of transformation with you because I have changed so much .Changed from a person full of hatred. Hatred toward people I never even knew. People I was taught are my enemies. What I found out was that I was my biggest enemy. My self loathing and hatred for myself kept me in a place of judgment and racism. Starting to learn to love myself was the beginning of the transformation in my outer life too. The tragedies that happened to me in my life have been stepping stones for growth and empowerment. They have given me the gift of being able to understand the suffering of others and therefore being able to be in a place of compassion. The most recent tragedy being in January of this year 2009.
Wow! I just got what I call Godbumps?.I just notice what the date is today?the day that I am writing these words?it is the 5th of June 2009. Exactly 42 years ago the Six Day War started. My eyes are filling with tears as I write this. I remember that day like it was yesterday. This is the war that brought on the Occupation?..imagine how life here would have been had we not gone in this direction. God knows !!! Maybe we would not be at all?but I doubt it?..